CAPTAINS OF THE BROTHERHOOD
Why? Captains? Well.... When you were a kid and you picked teams for something, what was the first thing you did? Pick Captains. These men are Captains for the Brotherhood, Natural born leaders, Life takers and Heart breakers and some of the most prestigious men ever to grace United States Soil or any other 3rd world country
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WARNING!!!
The following men are Captain's in the Brotherhood. They are highly qualified, extremely attractive, & Very Very Dangerous... never look them in the face. PROCEED WITH CAUTION!!!... and Please Don't waste their time... they hate that.
WOJDACKANAUT BROTHERHOOD OF LIFE FILE (WBL SERIAL #0001)
RANK AND NAME: (C-1)
CAPTAIN RAY
CALL SIGN:
Renegade Ray
DOB:
JAN 26TH 1972
WEAPON OF DESTRUCTION:
2013 Ski Doo Renegade 800r
Bio: Captain Ray is one of the founding fathers of the group know as the WBL. He is strong, intelligent, witty, extremely attractive, and very dangerous. Ray is fluent in more then a dozen foreign languages, he's vast knowledge of cultures and traditions make him almost impossible to find because he blends in and becomes one of the locals. He is adaptable to almost any situation and His soft spoken persona equates him to a deadly Botswana cobra ready to strike at any given moment. He has the loyalty of his men and you must never cross him.... or shush him..... (no on likes that shit) just let him tell his bullshit stories and please do not comment while he is mid sentence, he might kill you.
The Birth of a New Legend...
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R.I.P. Ol' Girl
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WOJDACKANAUT BROTHERHOOD OF LIFE FILE (WBL SERIAL #0002)
RANK AND NAME: (C-1)
CAPTAIN DAVE LEONONITES
CALL SIGN:
CLEAR-CUT/ FREERIDE
DOB:
APRIL 28TH 1971
WEAPON OF DESTRUCTION:
A confiscated 2012 Ski doo 800 that took a swim in Houghton Lake
Bio: Dave is a master-conversator and suffers from Bull-shit-itius or BSI. His craft is so finely tuned that most people don't even know what he's talking about half the time. Dave's extra special good looks give him the advantage of having a "honest face" which is where most people go wrong. Don't be fooled by his boyish good looks and silver coated tongue. He has powers similar to obi wan kenobi and some say he has mind control powers. He can talk people into the most precarious conditions and most women with remove their clothes and not even know it when the're around dave. He's a very dangerous man and you should always be on guard around him. You life depends on it.... even his own wife still thinks that she's in high school and that they are dating .... she has no idea she's a mother of 12 and is 62 years of age.... That's how good he is...
Place your bets... Place your bets
this sled was ordered 5 times and never picked up... Dave is more full of shit then a Irish potato Pig plantation.
Dave's old black bitch R.I.P. |
Sled Re-assignment... Lou's old sled is now owned by Captain Dave. Lou is now riding the pine.
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WOJDACKANAUT BROTHERHOOD OF LIFE FILE (WBL SERIAL #0008)
RANK AND NAME: (C-1)
CAPTAIN
Thomas "Hard On" Monks
CALL SIGN:
Low Balls or Uncle Drunk
DOB:
Rumor has it that he is Moses's Oldest son
He also was a Spartan.... in Sparta... The only survivor of the original 300.
WEAPON OF DESTRUCTION:
Thunder Cat 1000
APPLICATION STATUS:
APPROVED BY THE CAPTAINS BOARD
Promoted to Captain on 1/11/19 by Unanimous Captains Vote
Congratulation Captain Tom "Hard On" Monks !!!!!
SPONSOR:
CAPTAIN Dave
Uncle Tom is one of the Good guys.... Even though he's stuck in 1976 and His dental practice is stuck in 1945.... he one Great dude.... Uncle Tom has plenty to say when he confronted with stupidity... He has no problem setting other members straight especially when they might have one of the following... Diahirea of the mouth, Bullshit itius... Stupi-phonis-a-outis-your-assis ... if you have a weight problem... or your just plain ugly. He has a carefull, honest, and no-nosense way of assisting and dealing with your problem.... no matter how un-pretty it is... and sometimes (Todd) you have many and/or of these problems.
CAPTAIN
Thomas "Hard On" Monks
CALL SIGN:
Low Balls or Uncle Drunk
DOB:
Rumor has it that he is Moses's Oldest son
He also was a Spartan.... in Sparta... The only survivor of the original 300.
WEAPON OF DESTRUCTION:
Thunder Cat 1000
APPLICATION STATUS:
APPROVED BY THE CAPTAINS BOARD
Promoted to Captain on 1/11/19 by Unanimous Captains Vote
Congratulation Captain Tom "Hard On" Monks !!!!!
SPONSOR:
CAPTAIN Dave
Uncle Tom is one of the Good guys.... Even though he's stuck in 1976 and His dental practice is stuck in 1945.... he one Great dude.... Uncle Tom has plenty to say when he confronted with stupidity... He has no problem setting other members straight especially when they might have one of the following... Diahirea of the mouth, Bullshit itius... Stupi-phonis-a-outis-your-assis ... if you have a weight problem... or your just plain ugly. He has a carefull, honest, and no-nosense way of assisting and dealing with your problem.... no matter how un-pretty it is... and sometimes (Todd) you have many and/or of these problems.
Fastest Sled 2018 (Uncle Tom)
WOJDACKANAUT BROTHERHOOD OF LIFE FILE (WBL SERIAL #0004)
RANK AND NAME: (C-1)
CAPTAIN STEFANO
(don't call him Steve)
CALL SIGN:
THE GROUTER
DOB:
10-9-1968
WEAPONS OF DESTRUCTION:
2003 ARCTIC CAT F7 BLACK ... Deacesed 11-13-13
2011 Ski Doo 800 X-package ...
Born 11-25-13
2017 Ski doo 850 Adrenaline (Brand New with booster seat)
Bio: Stefano is a old school San Marion with a bad attitude. He talkes big, Cooks big, Rides Big, and Lives big. The only problem is,, he's not big at all... He 4'4" and is considered a legal dwaft in Maryland and Vermont. Here in Michigan he's as big as paul bunyon, Davey Crocket, or Jim Bowie. He doesn't take shit from people and doesn't' like to be tossed and if you have something to say about him... His clan of brothers will whip your ass faster then you can squeeze the charmin.
CAPTAIN STEFANO
(don't call him Steve)
CALL SIGN:
THE GROUTER
DOB:
10-9-1968
WEAPONS OF DESTRUCTION:
2003 ARCTIC CAT F7 BLACK ... Deacesed 11-13-13
2011 Ski Doo 800 X-package ...
Born 11-25-13
2017 Ski doo 850 Adrenaline (Brand New with booster seat)
Bio: Stefano is a old school San Marion with a bad attitude. He talkes big, Cooks big, Rides Big, and Lives big. The only problem is,, he's not big at all... He 4'4" and is considered a legal dwaft in Maryland and Vermont. Here in Michigan he's as big as paul bunyon, Davey Crocket, or Jim Bowie. He doesn't take shit from people and doesn't' like to be tossed and if you have something to say about him... His clan of brothers will whip your ass faster then you can squeeze the charmin.
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Congratulations!!! Captain Stefano!!! on your New 2011 X -package Sled.
Welcome to Ski doo you made it!!!
WOJDACKANAUT BROTHERHOOD OF LIFE FILE (WBL SERIAL #0004)
RANK AND NAME: (C-1)
CAPTAIN Curtis
CALL SIGN:
DickFinger
DOB:
TBD
WEAPONS OF DESTRUCTION:
2013 Arctic Cat 1100 Turbo
Aux sled: The Ditch Pickle
Bio: Curt is a natural born leader and at a height of 4'7" he's not the largest man but what he lacks in height he makes up in character. If you we're to measure character his height would shoot up to 6'9" which is a huge improvement. At one time he did in fact have one of the fastest sled in norther Michigan... now... well let's just say he no longer the king of the snow,,, he more the king of the gobbler. He loves apple pie, big boobs, and his turbo.
CAPTAIN Curtis
CALL SIGN:
DickFinger
DOB:
TBD
WEAPONS OF DESTRUCTION:
2013 Arctic Cat 1100 Turbo
Aux sled: The Ditch Pickle
Bio: Curt is a natural born leader and at a height of 4'7" he's not the largest man but what he lacks in height he makes up in character. If you we're to measure character his height would shoot up to 6'9" which is a huge improvement. At one time he did in fact have one of the fastest sled in norther Michigan... now... well let's just say he no longer the king of the snow,,, he more the king of the gobbler. He loves apple pie, big boobs, and his turbo.
Finally a Break thru with this "Dim Bulb"
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 2012 Turd-cycle-El-Fucko-Moron-o
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WOJDACKANAUT BROTHERHOOD OF LIFE FILE (WBL SERIAL #0006)
RANK AND NAME: (C-1)
CAPTAIN DOUG
CALL SIGN:
SHIT HAMMERED, slit eyes
DOB:
STILL BORN
WEAPON OF DESTRUCTION:
2006 Ski doo MXZ 800
APPLICATION STATUS:
APPROVED BY CAPTAINS BOARD 1-17-11
SPONSOR:
CAPTAIN STEFANO
Bio: Doug is a professional drinker and philanthropist. He is a fisher a men. When he goes out for the night with his life partner (Joe Joe) he tears shit up. Below is a actual footage of doug trying to walk up a hill. I think this video speaks for itself.... Doug also doubles a stunt dummy at frankenmuth, as seen in the picture below. He can sit motionless for hours (drunk of course) and when the opportunity presents itself.... Grab a butt or a boob without anyone even knowing it. This grabby guy gets away with more touchy --- Feely moments and no one is the wiser....He's a professional groper
 Doug posing at the Frankenmuth Dummy... Doug was chemically castrated for this photo |
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WOJDACKANAUT BROTHERHOOD OF LIFE FILE (WBL SERIAL #0007)
RANK AND NAME: (C-1)
Captain TODD
CALL SIGN:
TRIPPLE CHIN / Blown Gut
Fat Albertslim
DOB:
N/A
WEAPONS OF DESTRUCTION:
2008 Yellow/Black Ski Doo MXZ 800R
One Bad son of bitch!!!
Bio: Todd at one time was considered legally retarded in Vermont and Rhode Island with a iq of 16.7 but don't feel bad, in Michigan he's right as rain.... you might have seen him on the short bus with his helmet on singing billy joel's we didn't start the fire. It was all an act. You see, Todd is actually a Genius with a extra vertabre... Yes, that's right... He posed as a mentally challenged youth thru the 80's and part of the 90's acting stupid, doing drugs, getting laid, Playing with himself.... for what you ask? Well, to win the love his sweet lady (lisa) you see Lisa had a soft spot for moron's, retarts, total idiots.... and todd thought if somehow he could act like one it would get the attention of the hottest chick in school.... Eureka!!! it worked.... he fell for this imbasol like a love sick puppy. The only problems is now everyone thinks he's as dumb as a box of stones.... He's stupider then hammered shit!! well,,,, i know your secret..... you Eienstein Muther Fudger.....
Todd's new Baby.... Congratulations!!
...it's a Fat Bitch!!
Also,,,, This guy can EAT !!
Captain TODD
CALL SIGN:
TRIPPLE CHIN / Blown Gut
Fat Albertslim
DOB:
N/A
WEAPONS OF DESTRUCTION:
2008 Yellow/Black Ski Doo MXZ 800R
One Bad son of bitch!!!
Bio: Todd at one time was considered legally retarded in Vermont and Rhode Island with a iq of 16.7 but don't feel bad, in Michigan he's right as rain.... you might have seen him on the short bus with his helmet on singing billy joel's we didn't start the fire. It was all an act. You see, Todd is actually a Genius with a extra vertabre... Yes, that's right... He posed as a mentally challenged youth thru the 80's and part of the 90's acting stupid, doing drugs, getting laid, Playing with himself.... for what you ask? Well, to win the love his sweet lady (lisa) you see Lisa had a soft spot for moron's, retarts, total idiots.... and todd thought if somehow he could act like one it would get the attention of the hottest chick in school.... Eureka!!! it worked.... he fell for this imbasol like a love sick puppy. The only problems is now everyone thinks he's as dumb as a box of stones.... He's stupider then hammered shit!! well,,,, i know your secret..... you Eienstein Muther Fudger.....
Todd's new Baby.... Congratulations!!
...it's a Fat Bitch!!
Also,,,, This guy can EAT !!
Let's face it... this sled ain't for everyone. I mean it's got more options then a Getto conversion Van. But... that's the way he likes it..... He's a little flashy.....He ordered this baby E.N.O.
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All the Captains took "a picture" with Todd's Wife Lisa to Commemorate this Historic Occasion.... Good Luck Todd!!! ... and See you Later Lisa...
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